A girl and her Hair :My Natural hair Journey

My Journey to hair-ceptance

Recently there has been a movement geared towards women of African descent not using relaxers to alter their natural hair texture.

Some people are all for it, while some people not on board because they say it’s too stressful.

I don’t use relaxers on my hair anymore. Here’s why(the long version).

The beginning

The fact that i am a very self conscious person, makes me worry about what people think of me a lot. It is getting better now ,it used to be way worse before.

When I was 9 years old ,I got into my first year of secondary school. It was difficult to say the least, because all my time had been spent mostly with my siblings .

Obviously, I was the youngest in my class, I preferred to play with Junior students because they were my age.My own class mates were interested in boys, tights and periods,me,i just wanted to play ‘Catcher’.

I used to think I was very ugly, and it wasn’t until 2008 that I finally gained some self esteem.  (side note: one of the boys in my class told me years later that I was amongst the finest girls class ,but let’s not focus on that).

Most of my time was spent trying to fit in and trying to make sure I was deemed mature. So I could be involved in things and not just be the smart, tinrin gbeku, glasses girl.

If I could tell my past self anything it would be to tell anyone who called me childish to shove off because I was still a child.

Discovery and Decision

I am almost ashamed to say this but i didn’t know that not relaxing your hair was an option.I thought leaving it natural was something that only deeper life people did because they were weird.

The person who inspired me was  my friend that did her big chop and I really loved her hair. By that time I was already frustrated with my own mane’s problems. It was a limp lifeless thing that I hated.

I transitioned, I was afraid of looking strange but I kept my head high. When my hair came in, I was Sooooooo happy. My ‘Fro had weight, it felt healthy, in fact my afro was one in town😁

Reminiscing

It’s been a long journey for that unsure, insecure and immature girl who prayed that people would like her. She prepared conversation in her head for whatever new school (I went to 4 secondary schools) ,she was going to.

Embracing my natural hair was a biiiig part of it of how confident I am today. Obviously I am not saying I am completely there yet but I am taking GIANT steps.

I am writing this because I started a new regimen on November 30.It should be for a 3 month trial period and I was just reminiscing on how far I have come.God has to take all the glory for that.

“I love my natural hair because it is a gift that we black women have” -Lola Atobatele

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Some of my favorite natural hair blogs include Black Girl Long Hair, Curl Centric, Craving Yellow.

What are some of yours?
Do you have any hair tips or hair journey stories? Please share in the comments.

Why you should Love your Accent: This Igbo girl’s view .

Let’s Talk about my Accent.

I have an igbo accent, well not really but when I pronounce some words you can tell I am from the eastern part of Nigeria and I am proud of it.

I really don’t know why people see accents as a mark of intelligence.When I was in school I really abhorred all those girls that used to put ‘R’ everywhere in the name of sounding tush – ‘whort is that‘.

The ones that killed me were our American accents- Oh my God. How do you have the accent of a country you have never been to. Even those who have stayed there a while only have slight accents.

Someone who spent a single summer of their 19 year life in Chelsea will now be speaking with an accent- B*tch please.

A person’s language patterns develop fully by the time they are eleven or twelve, so their base accent will always be the same.

Now of course if you are in a certain place it will affect your speech, intonation and what not. But for God’s sake don’t come here and be giving us horrible accents after a 2 week vacation.

Don’t get me wrong there is nothing wrong with improving elocution. Learning to speak so that people everywhere can easily decipher what you say. However, ridding yourself of your accent should not be your primary goal.

I always make fun of accents, I poke fun at myself when I say ‘Craydeet’ instead of ‘Credit’😄.No matter what part of the country you are from, I will probably laugh at your accent.

Now I don’t do it to be mean but I think it is one of those cultural quirks that amuse and define us at the same time. The same way I find Yoruba Agbadas funny because of the movements involved in keeping them at a place.

I laugh at igbo people that have ‘R and L factor’ . My friends laugh at me because I can’t say ‘Surulere’without biting my tongue 😢. I don’t mind because it’s just one of those things. The same way I laugh at their ‘H factor’ incidents.

At the end of the day i never assume anybody is stupid because of how they speak English. It’s not our mother tongue and if not for colonization, we have no business speaking it.

I am more inclined to believe that those people with their synthetic ‘accents’are the stupid ones. There more productive things to do than waste time trying to sound like someone else and failing woefully at it.

So embrace that your accent, improve your vocabulary and don’t apologize for the way you sound.

” An accent is someone speaking your language with the rules of their language ” – Trevor Noah Click To Tweet

What is your take on accents?

Let me know your views on this post, because I know some of you will disagree.